Anger Management Techniques

When something makes you uncomfortable, do you get mad? When something doesn’t go your way or is out of your control, do you explode in anger? Do you get angry out of nowhere and don’t know why? Do you ever feel uncontrollably enraged and like you’re seeing red? Anger management is a prevalent topic among athletes. Although anger can be characterized as normal and sometimes the result of competitiveness, it could also be a symptom of a lingering issue.

“Anger is like a strong wind. It calms down after a while, but lots of branches are already broken.” - Rumi 

While anger can be a healthy expression of emotion, it can also become an issue when it is destructive. It’s normal to get angry from time to time, but an issue can arise when that leads to aggressive behavior either towards others or towards oneself. The consequences of the heat of the moment are sometimes irreversible. One bad decision made out of rage can cost you your health, your relationships, your employment, your finances, your freedom, and more. The good news is that although it may feel uncontrollable, there are steps you can take to live more at peace. 

What causes anger issues?

It’s been my experience that when people struggle with anger, it’s because there is something unresolved somewhere inside of them. I believe that emotions are energy and all that energy has to go somewhere. So, when you don’t deal with hurtful experiences, it can often come out in anger. On top of that, when you play an aggressive sport like football, you’re in an environment where being tough and combative is part of the game–and that doesn’t always end when the game does. Furthermore, it’s been shown that anger, mood swings, and emotional outbursts can be symptoms of illness or injuries like depression, traumatic brain injury (TBI), or other physical ailments or brain disorders.

Causes of anger issues vary and may include:

• Fear

• Insecurity

• Uncertainty

• Mental Illness

• Addiction

• Alcoholism 

• Burnout

• Unhealed Trauma

• Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI)

• Physical Ailments Such as Diabetes

• Brain Disorders

• And More

5 Anger Management Techniques

1. Work with a professional. - As an athlete, your first instinct is probably to try to solve the problem on your own. While it’s awesome that you have an awareness that there is an issue that you’d like to tackle, explosive anger can be the result of a greater underlying issue. The best way to begin making real long-term changes is to work with a professional who can help you uncover what’s at the root of the problem. A mental health professional can help you discover the cause of the issue, help you process what you need to heal, offer guidance on additional testing or treatment, and offer solutions to help you deal with your emotions in healthier ways. 

2. Learn to pause before you react. - When someone or something pushes your buttons, it’s natural to immediately react. Sometimes, you’ll react before you even realize you are reacting! You can benefit from learning to slow down so you can give your brain a chance to catch up with your body and your emotions. Practicing mindfulness and meditation is the best way to train yourself to pause. With time and training, when a stressful moment occurs, it’ll be easier to remind yourself to take a couple of deep breaths before choosing how you want to approach the situation. 

3. Choose a different perspective. - What’s making you angry? Is there another way to see the situation? For example, maybe you’re taking something too personal and you would benefit from letting it go. Perhaps you’re reacting from a place of fear. I encourage you to acknowledge how you’re feeling but then look for the best, most productive way to help yourself move forward. What’s a more peaceful way to look at the situation? As Dr. Wayne Dyer famously said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

4. Focus on what you can control. - In moments when things feel out of control, it’s tempting to get angry and frustrated. Take a moment to ask yourself if you’re allowing the situation to have power over you. You get to control how you think, feel, and act. If you blame your reaction on a situation, then you’re giving it power over you because you’re putting it in the driver’s seat. Take a step back and choose how you want to handle the situation. While there are no wrong emotions, you are responsible for your behavior. 

5. Learn to talk about your emotions. - When you bottle things up, sooner or later, they will spill out. Getting comfortable with expressing your feelings can help prevent explosiveness. Building emotional intelligence skills can help you become more comfortable with emotions. Start by naming your emotions more often. Your emotions will naturally fluctuate throughout the day so check in with yourself periodically to identify how you’re feeling. See if you can pick up on what others are feeling, too. Then, you can begin to express emotions with others at opportune times. To help with this, work with someone who can hold space for you regularly in a judgment-free environment. Emotional awareness along with coping skills, will go a long way in helping you get to know yourself so you can learn to express yourself better and have more control over your reactions. 

Would your like help with a mental health issue for yourself or a loved one? Contact the Hall of Fame Health (HOFH) concierge service at (866) 404-HOFH to find out more about treatment centers, health services, and providers. The service line is open to athletes and non-athletes. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency or require emergency assistance, please call the HOFH Crisis Line at 866-901-1245, call 911, or head to your nearest local emergency room.