How Athletes Can Balance Vulnerability and Toughness

Published by: HOFBH

As athletes, vulnerability is quite rarely talked about. In the super-tough culture of sports, many of us get locked into the pressure of fitting into what is regularly glorified as “mental toughness.” Quite often, the term “mental toughness” is misinterpreted to mean that vulnerability is not an option. We learn that showing weakness of any kind is not only looked down upon but also viewed as a potential detriment in our ability to perform.

“Man up.” How often have we heard this phrase? It applies to not only the physical body but also to mindset and emotions. It’s as if we’re supposed to be in control over everything and care about nothing, which is impossible when we’re human beings.

However, as athletes, most of us have learned the virtue of hiding or masking problems so as not to expose our vulnerabilities. In locker rooms, we’re taught to compartmentalize our problems in order to focus on performance. Few are taught how to unpack the heavy stuff once practice and games are over.

One of the biggest difficulties that we face in compartmentalizing our vulnerabilities, is that we are unable to acknowledge when we have unresolved issues which are an inevitable part of life, so we end up suppressing them rather than healing. These problems then compound and eventually explode in one way or another. Secondly, even if we wanted to heal, we find it incredibly difficult to ask for help because it somehow means we can’t handle things on our own, which can be seen as another sign of weakness.

Why having vulnerability is a strength

Among the core of our values at the Hall of Fame Behavioral Health is vulnerability. In working to support athletes, we view vulnerability as a strength because it’s a commitment to bettering oneself. We believe that if we can work on developing physical strength, then we can also do the inner work to improve with the help of the right team.

Challenges are a part of the human experience. We know that no one is perfect, and we believe that no one should have to burdened by trying to live as if they are in order to meet perceived expectations.

Here’s why vulnerability is both a strength and an asset in developing mental toughness:

  1. When we have the vulnerability to work through our challenges, we then have control over how we get to experience our life, including the joy and peace we deserve to feel.

  2. Everyone has difficulties and flaws. When we choose to work through our issues, we’re taking courageous and brave steps to walk through the fire, rather than avoiding it.

  3. Mental toughness, therefore, is having the courage to be aware of our vulnerabilities and the grit and determination to work through them.

How to seek help

The first step in asking for help is admitting that we need help and then giving ourselves permission to work through our difficulties. Hiding pain internally only prolongs healing. Whether it’s addiction, trauma, anxiety, or just feeling like something isn’t right, it’s up to us to decide that we want to do the work today for a better tomorrow. Healing isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.

The next step is to reach out to people or organizations who have the right support system. The Hall of Fame Behavioral Health provides comprehensive resources for mental health, behavioral health, and substance use issues for all athletes, their families, and beyond. Our dedicated concierge service can be reached at (866) 901-1241

If you are experiencing a mental health emergency or require emergency assistance, please call the HOFBH Crisis Line at 866-901-1245 or call 911 or head to your nearest local emergency room.

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Successfully Transitioning into Life After Sports

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How to Overcome Blocks in Asking for Help